ARE YOU READY TO GET DIRTY?

Today I want to interrupt your incessant social media scrolling of reel upon reel in search of pseudo healing to talk about therapy and why you need to be willing to get dirty.

Healing…

Do you truly know what this means? I’m putting all my bets on NO (and I’m not the betting kind of person).

Healing is not a transaction to beget.

Let’s swallow a spoonful dose of reality for a moment, shall we? Healing does not occur just in the watching, in the reading or even in the saying. Healing occurs in the moving. Your existence here on earth is all about movement.

Anatomically, you're built with an autonomic nervous system that regulates involuntary physiological processes in your body such as heart rate, blood pressure, respiration, digestion and sexual arousal. Movement is happening in your body without your awareness or control. Is it completely an involuntary process or have we just evolved out of this awareness? Who knows, but name me any machine created with such perfection and precision… I won’t wait.

The kind of movement I’m talking about is deeper than sweaty sessions in a trendy gym. I’m talking about moving your mind. Challenging yourself. Deconstructing your conditioning and moving into remembering.

Remember what? Well, that’s something you can rediscover in therapy.

As a collective we have subscribed to whatever the opposite of consciousness is. There are so many labels that describe this ‘unawareness’ and honestly, I can’t be bothered placing my energy into its description here.

Consciousness is not something we should be searching for. It’s not a gift to be given or received. It’s not a privilege for those who meditate for a lifetime on mountain tops.

It’s already yours! Always has been, always will be!

I can sense you’re asking what all of this has to do with therapy? Absolutely nothing and everything. You see, that's what consciousness is.

Let's debunk an urban myth that therapy fixes your life. As a therapist, this is utter bullshit! No one (other than you) has or should have the power to change your life for the better. Therapy is scary, confronting and exhausting, yet nurturing, beautiful and revolutionary. Observe the force of nature. It relies on nothing or nobody. It simply exists whatever the season. How absurd would it be for me to counsel a tree on how to be a better tree. A therapists purpose is to gently guide you through your process.

When you find the courage to embark on a therapeutic journey, be mindful of the list of circumstances you bring with you (they are just as irrelevant as time). A good therapist will entertain the idea of your circumstances and converse with you about them until your fuse fizzles out - this is exhausting for both parties. However, a great therapist will be able to sift through all that mind chatter, hold space (usually with lots of pauses) and guide you through your fears and into self-awareness and subsequently healing opportunities.

Not Interested...

What I’m coming to understand as a therapist is that people’s circumstances aren't the issue. They hold zero value in healing and growth. You know, the ‘who did this to me’ and the ‘who said that to me.’ They are just things that happen, they are not you. All of it is totally irrelevant. The core of therapy is how does it make you feel and what do you need to do to process those feelings. Things that happen in your life are as valuable as monopoly money. Things will always happen for the rest of your life and when you learn to use your mental currency in a sophisticated way you're better equipped to deal with those things.

I have a kind arrogance about things that happen to people. A kindness to acknowledge them and an arrogance to do nothing about them because of their irrelevance. Things and events that happen mean nothing to your spirit/higher selves. The journey travelled up until this point is not my main interest about you.

As your therapist, what interests me is where do we go from here?

So, what now?

So, please, refrain from delving into therapy with a wish list that you and/or your life will be ‘fixed’. You are not broken! Therapy helps by returning you to yourself. A responsibility that is solely yours. It empowers you with a renewed self-awareness, and I guess this is why therapy can be scary. Not many of us have absolute power over our lives. Are we truly ready to see ourselves and come to terms with the mess we’ve made in pursuit of happiness.

I cannot emphasise enough to you how normal it is to have lived this way!

Therapy comes with the 'good risk' that you will find yourself. Many people are in love with that well-developed and fine-tuned fear brain, which is where most people operate from. Look what happens with a love like that... This is why you need to move away from a transactional existence. The spirit/higher self is not aligned with ‘give and take’.

I want you to see therapy as an energy exchange. A space where consciousness meets and percolates, where the universe fuses and where magic happens. Meet your therapist with an openness, kindness and trust as they do with you. It’s one thing to be the chosen one, the enlightened one and another thing to be willing to roll up the sleeves and get dirty deconstructing cemented mindsets.

If I am the therapist you can align with then I’m only as far away as your next session. So, let’s get dirty, shall we?